Friday 16 November 2012

Why we need men that care

I've been thinking about the impact of fatherless alot recently. Both my husband and I have experienced it in different ways. My husband's father died when he was 6 months old so he never really knew him and my father died suddenly during my first year at university. We're both very aware of the impact this has had on our lives, as adults. We both work at the Jesus Centre in our Step up project which reaches out to the homeless, roofless and vulnerably housed. Statistically up to 85% of them will have experienced some form of fatherlessness.

This may include an emotionally absent father, physically absent, passive or aggressive father.  Some of the documented issues fatherlessness creates for young men who experience it include:

* Anger
* Insecurities about who they are
* Fierce independence 
* lack of trust in authority
* competativeness
* inability to share their feelings  
* inability to relate to their own children 

Consequently they struggle to relate to the notion of God as a loving father who is there for them.

 So what's that got to do with needing men who care? Well, it got me thinking because we're recruiting a new Deputy manager, Drop in manager and personal development worker at the Jesus Centre at the moment. Statistically, according to the latest figures in 'The UK voluntary sector workforce Almanac' 68% of staff in the voluntary sector are woman. 


As a species women are generally much better suited to the nurturing, caring role which is why so many will go for jobs where they can teach, help and support people to make improvements in their lives


However, statistically here at the Jesus Centre 75% of our visitors to the Step Up project are male. 55% of our total visitors to the Jesus Centre are male. That's an awful lot of men who will be effected by issues of fatherlessness. They need men who can positively model fathering to them if we want them to even begin to relate to God their heavenly father.


Men who can help them learn how to find forgiveness for their fathers and release for their anger
Men who have found their security in who God says they are 
Men who can support them show them it's ok to be vulnerable and admit your need for other people
Men who are trustworthy and will be true to their word
Men who will listen and encourage them to share their feelings
Men who will relate to them and teach them how to relate as fathers to their own children.

As the saying goes "Anyone can be a dad.. it takes a man to be a father"
Are you man enough to take up the challenge to be a father to this fatherless generation?